Flag of Our Democrats!

Miller on Pelosi

ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT observations from Dennis Miller!



(H/T Dick McDonald)

A Final Plea

"At some point, Zionist and spiritual Jews like me are going to stop referring to secular, atheistic, Christian-hating, leftist 'Jews' as Jews at all. They need a proper name. After all, if you vote for folks who don't support Israel, never go to temple (and take pride in that), don't believe in God, distrust Christians as much or more than Muslims and essentially dislike religion, what exactly makes you a Jew?"

Good question.

Where are the Jews who vilified Mel Gibson’s drunken words when unintoxicated Muslims acquiesce to the hatred, kidnapping, bombing, and murder of Jews? Aren’t anti-Gibson Jews as qualified to condemn Muslims, or is this an accepted form of Dhimmitude?

Ari Kaufman asks Jews some tough questions in A Final Plea.

Arguing About Coffee

Readers may have noticed that I’ve been missing in action for some time now. After months of spotty writing and a few cartoons, I finally have something to report.

My wife (Carol) and I argued this morning. No, it wasn’t about politics, religion, Democrats or the media – it was about coffee.

To me, coffee isn’t a big issue. I’ve had coffee in India, Kenya, El Salvador and Brazil. I’ve had coffee at crime scenes, conventions, hospitals, fishing boats, police stations, and guard posts.

The worst coffee I ever drank was as a machine-gunner in Echo Company (9th Marine Regiment), when I stirred instant coffee from leftover C-rations that were processed during World War II. That coffee wasn’t Juan Valdez’ premier crop, but a third-rate harvest picked a decade or more before I was born - boiled and processed into powder, and warehoused in boxes with a pack of Viceroys and a can of green scrambled eggs. I opened and consumed the contents of that box in November 1976, in the rain and wind near a beach in Pusan, Korea.

Yes, it was bad, but it was the worst coffee I ever enjoyed. I used it to warm my hands until it got cold, and I drank it cold because it was still warmer than I was. So when Carol rants about bad coffee, it’s hard for me to get excited.

But this morning was different – different not because Dunkin Donuts is better than Starbucks, but because Carol wasn’t in bed writhing in pain. You see, Carol suffers from arthritis and osteoporosis, debilitating diseases that grind joints and makes bones brittle. After several minor strains to her back over the years, ligaments around L-4 and L-5 enlarged themselves to compensate, slowly strangling her spinal chord. As she used yoga and exercise to compensate, an adjacent disk herniated and pressed into her spine like a slow knife. Throughout this past year, the problem worsened despite her relentless effort.

I’ve seen people crippled by accidents and sclerosis, but until now I could not imagine what weeks of watching a loved one laying in bed crippled by pain was like. She put on a brave face for many months, but by this summer the time on her feet had grown shorter and shorter until she was finally bed-ridden. I understand that couples go through one form of aging or another, but when your life partner’s joking request to kill her gets more frequent and less funny, even me – the big cop whose seen everything, was begining to struggle.

Her leg pain grew worse after she awoke from surgery on Sept 29th, and for two more torturous weeks, she laid in bed at home as I fed her soup, small meals, opiates, nerve pills, and stool softeners. Her surgeon found another chunk of jagged disk and pulled it out last Friday. She awakened a few hours later and, for the first time in more than a year, she felt no pain to either leg. She was on her feet the next day and I drove her home.

Her recovery is progressing, and while she still cannot stoop or twist, she’s expected to make a full recovery by next January!...

Which is why I was so happy to argue about coffee today – I’ve got my girl back.

And we’ve settled our argument – I’ll drink the three bags of Starbucks we have in our freezer, and she can buy all the French roast of her choosing.

I’ll savor every drop.

Happy Columbus Day!

This morning, when I wished the coffee blender-guy a Happy Colombus Day, he told me Vikings discovered America first. When I reminded him of America’s aboriginals, we went back further to dinosaurs, rodents, reptiles, microbiology, and finally agreed on dirt.

So we agreed to celebrate Dirt-Clod Day because they were here first – unless we go back to molten lava, elements in flux, and dust from exploded stars that began as hydrogen atoms fused by gravity. And if we agree on star dust, then we know that movement and change are the only constant components of our common history. And if we agree on movement and change, and that no one considers returning America to the reptiles and primordial ooze, then aboriginals and Vikings have the same relevance.

And if that’s the case, then I celebrate the adventurer Columbus, 1492, and those who have settled our country since then. Today matters as much as history, and those who have become dust will return to what we all are – the biochemical results of supernovae, stirred by God’s grace.

Happy Columbus Day!